30 Apr Welcoming Baby Imogen!

It was such an honor to be a part of this couple becoming parents and a family of 3!  Thank you to this sweet TCM client for sharing their birth story!

Imogen Vale’s Birth Story

On Friday, January 3rd, 2020, I began feeling mild contractions. I was 40 weeks and 3 days pregnant, and very ready to meet this little one! My pregnancy had been quite healthy, and I was confident in our choice to do a home birth. As those first contractions began, I felt both excitement and apprehension, and tried to simultaneously convince myself that it was nothing, but also to prepare for labor – though I had no idea what that really meant. I went to sleep as usual, knowing that if it was indeed the beginning of labor I would need my rest. I was able to sleep through the night (aside from the million trips to the bathroom), but then at 5am, I woke up to contractions strong enough that I had trouble falling back asleep. I decided to get up and distract myself through them, as advised in our birthing class (shout out to BirthEd!). We spent Saturday morning and afternoon at home, in contact with one of our midwives, Mary, and our doula, Molly, timing the frequency and length of contractions occasionally.

Throughout most of the day, the contractions were anywhere from 3-7 minutes apart and lasted about 45 seconds. They made me pause what I was doing and breathe but didn’t feel unmanageable. We watched Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban to continue our marathon, tried to clean up the house a bit, and went on a walk around the block (which I’m sure was an entertaining sight to anyone watching – I had to stop walking with every contraction and hold onto Justin). In the living room, Justin inflated the birthing tub, and we were convinced that we would have a baby that day.

However, progress wasn’t being made as quickly as hoped, as contractions were increasing in intensity but not length. Mary suggested having my chiropractor, Danielle, whom I had been seeing weekly, come over for an adjustment and acupuncture. Danielle determined that the baby was likely sitting a little crooked, and after the adjustment, she gave me a few moves that I could be doing periodically to help encourage the baby down the birth canal. I walked up and down the stairs sideways and did lunges on my right side for a few hours. Intensity increased after that, and we knew that it was getting to be the time when we wanted our doula there. We still optimistically believed that we would have a baby that night. Unfortunately, the experienced and insightful Molly came in with a dose of reality and said that rest needed to happen. When resting, my contractions slowed, which was discouraging because I assumed that labor would be linear, so it felt like taking a step backwards. However, in hindsight, we learned that an ebb and flow to labor is normal, and this was simply my body getting the rest it needed to continue to labor.

By the early hours of Sunday morning, the intensity of contractions had significantly increased, and I was exhausted and in serious need of reassurance that my body was actually making progress. I was vocalizing through every contraction by this point, and needed many reminders to relax my body. With Molly’s help, we determined that having Mary come over to check my dilation would be helpful to me mentally, so she came over and assessed my progress, determining that I was 5-6 cm dilated. This was relatively encouraging and assured me that something was happening. Baby was monitored regularly with the doppler, and was doing well both during contractions and between contractions, which was a relief.

Justin and Molly took turns forcing me to eat and drink and supporting me through contractions, while Mary regularly monitored me and the baby, ensuring we were both healthy. Everyone was able to rest in shifts, which made me incredibly grateful to be doing a home birth, where rest was possible. My preferred position for contractions was standing, holding onto Justin, and rocking back and forth. If he wasn’t available, I held onto door jams or leaned on the table or birthing ball. Later that morning, I worked hard to get that baby out – I did lunges and squats, walked the stairs, and Justin helped me with abdominal “lift and tucks” (which made contractions very intense – I hated them!). By 10am, I was more dilated and was glad to be progressing, but definitely wished that it would happen faster.

Throughout the afternoon, contractions got even more intense – there were many times when I said something to the effect of “I feel like my butt is going to fall off!” I was 7-8cm dilated, with less dilation happening on the right side. The baby and my body were trying so hard to work together, but the baby was struggling to get into the correct position. We tried doing side lying releases, but it was far too uncomfortable for me, so we switched to using the rebozo method. This helped take some of the heaviness off my back, bringing a bit of relief. Our other midwife, Kelsi, arrived, and we discussed having Danielle come over again. Danielle (on her husband’s birthday!) adjusted me again, did acupuncture (though with fewer needles this time because it was difficult for me to stay still through contractions), and had me get into a deep runner’s lunge on the right side – this brought on the most intense contractions yet, by far. During the contractions in the runner’s lunge position, I said, “I can’t do this” for the first time – but Justin, Molly, and Danielle all reassured me that I was safe, strong, and capable. Being in the runner’s lunge through so many contractions made things progress more quickly, and by 9pm, the tub was filled with warm water and I felt like it was go time!

Being in the water felt wonderful, though the contractions still took all of my attention. By this point, I was so in my own head that I hardly knew what was going on around me and was fully focused on safely bringing this baby into the world. I was disappointed to find out that I needed to do runner’s lunges in the tub as well, and my vocalizations were much louder than they had been earlier. Molly would come over to the tub and put a hunk of orange or an apple slice or some coconut water near my head and make me eat to keep up my energy – the entire time I’d been struggling to eat, and she knew I’d need all the power and energy I could muster very soon! I realized just how tired I was when I fell asleep between contractions, with Molly or Justin holding my head up out of the water, but the anticipation of finally having my baby in my arms was incredibly motivating.

At 10:45pm, I thought I heard something that sounded like a gunshot and felt a huge release of pressure – it took me a few seconds to realize what had happened, but then I asked if my water had broken and they confirmed that it had. Ten minutes later, I felt the overwhelming need to push. It was like my body was doing it for me, and all I needed to do was embrace it and let it happen. Pushing was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, and yet felt empowering and relieving. I was on my hands and knees, the position in which I felt the most powerful, and Justin held my head – supporting me both emotionally and physically (for some reason, I put my face in the water during each push). At one point, Kelsi told me that I could reach down and feel where the baby was. I was able to feel the baby’s head about to come out, which was so incredible. I said, “that’s not a part of my body!” Feeling the head gave me renewed energy and with just a few more pushes, my baby was out! Kelsi gave a gentle nudge in the right direction, and I pulled the baby out of the water. It was the most exhilarating and emotional experience to hold my baby, whom I had nourished and anticipated and loved for 40 weeks, to my chest for the first time.

The first sound from the baby was a sneeze, but there was no crying and our back rubbing didn’t seem to be enough, so Mary quickly cleared the airway and then we heard that first beautiful cry! I sat in the tub and Justin and I marveled at our baby. Mary kept using he/him pronouns, so we assumed that the baby had male genitalia, but then she said, “I don’t know why I keep saying he!” so I checked, and we knew that our baby would be named Imogen. I commented that she “didn’t even look like an alien,” as we had been prepared for a funny-looking newborn. But she was perfect! Justin cut the cord after about 25 minutes, and I delivered the placenta soon after. Justin had his first skin-to-skin time as Kelsi helped me out of the tub, to the bathroom, and into bed. Molly heated up the pho that we had ordered on Saturday and brought it to us – THE best meal I had ever eaten. Molly headed out after that. In bed, I was able to nurse Imogen for the first time, and we studied every lovely element of her. She had the longest toes and perfect little ears. Her shoulders were furry with lanugo and her skin was sticky with vernix. Her fingernails already needed a trim, too! We took pictures and sent some of the basics about her to close family members – we included a picture, her name and nickname (Mo), and birth stats (9 pounds 4 ounces and 22 inches long).

Mary and Kelsi cleaned everything up and then checked on Mo and I. She passed her newborn exam with flying colors, and I was grateful to not need any stitches. After giving some instructions for the next 30 hours or so until Mary would come back, Mary and Kelsi left. It was a bizarre feeling having everyone gone and having a baby outside of my body! We slept for a few hours, and when we woke up to feed Imogen, I said, “she’s still here!” – a comment that would be repeated a lot in the first few days. I felt disbelief and amazement that I had actually grown a human being inside of my body and then spent 43 hours pushing her out. There was truly no way to prepare for the flood of emotions that I would feel finally having her in my arms. Imogen Vale, you are so loved!

PS: I can’t imagine what this experience would have been like if it weren’t for my amazing support team. Justin, thank you for being a steady, calm presence, for putting up with so many (pretty obnoxious) vocalizations, and for loving me and Imogen so well. I couldn’t have asked for a better partner, and Mo is so lucky to have you as her dad! Danielle, I basically credit you with getting this baby out – thank you so much for giving up a huge chunk of your weekend to help us. You went above and beyond, and I’ll forever be grateful. Molly, thank you for never giving up on tapping my shoulders and hips to make me relax, for reminding me of my strength, and for ensuring that we rested, ate, and drank – I couldn’t have made it through without you! Mary and Kelsi, thank you for providing such personal, intuitive, and empowering care throughout the entire pregnancy, labor and birth, and postpartum period. The love and care that you put into your work is obvious, and I will always look back on this entire experience with gratefulness and joy.